Friday, August 21, 2009

My Husband, The Comedian

If asked to describe my husband in one word, most people that know him would probably say easy-going, quiet, even-tempered or something else along those lines. I don't think humorous is the first word that comes to mind when someone thinks of Jesse. In all actuality, some of the funniest things I've ever heard have come from him. He says things that, even years later, still make me laugh out loud whenever I think if them. Maybe it's because he is so quiet that when something funny comes out of his mouth it hits me extra hard because he's not the one you would expect it to come from. I hope you enjoy his humor in the following stories as much as I do.

My brother, Richard, is notorious for his expensive taste. One night, Jesse and I went out to dinner with Richard and his wife, Jill. Richard wanted to go to Fleming's Steakhouse at the Gateway. The restaurant was way too expensive but it turned out to be a really fun night, except for Jesse ending the night with a self-inflicted sickness which actually made me quite mad. How could he throw up a meal that was so expensive! He tried to make the situation better by saying, "At least I got to taste it twice." Ew, gross!!!

Months later when we were talking about the night we went to Fleming's and how expensive it was Richard said, "Why did we go there? Didn't we have a coupon or something?"

I said, "Richard, they don't really give out coupons for restaurants like that."

Then Jesse piped up and said, "Yeah Rich, we got it in our Valpak."

It still cracks me up.

The next story occurred when Jesse was working as a brick mason for my dad. There was never a dull moment with the men on his crew because something crazy was always going on in at least one of their lives at any given moment.

One guy, I'll call him T for his sake, was always fighting with his girlfriend. These were knock-down, drag-out fights these two lovebirds would have. As a result of one of these fights and the use of a large Salt City Candle against his face, T was missing a few teeth. He was a cowboy and this really made him look like a hillbilly.

At lunch one day, the guys were teasing T about how he always tucked in his shirt when all they were doing was laying brick. T said, "Some people consider it neat and proper to tuck in their shirt."

Jesse said, "Some people consider a full set of teeth neat and proper."

T didn't talk to him the rest of the day.